The Power of Listening in Times of Division

We can learn a lot today from how the City of Lewisville, Texas, responded four years ago to the death of George Floyd

Election Day has come and gone, but as the dust settles, tensions remain. In times like these, the instinct to react can feel overwhelming. However, as the story we share today shows, true progress often begins with listening.

The brutal death of George Floyd in 2020 sent shockwaves through the nation, leaving many communities—including Lewisville, Texas —facing questions they couldn’t ignore. The city’s response in that moment holds lessons for us today. Instead of rushing to respond, Lewisville took a step back.

They shut up and listened.

Mayor Rudy Durham and city leaders recognized that, for real change to happen, they needed to understand what was on the minds of their residents — especially those from under-represented communities. From that realization, the “Listen Learn Lead” initiative was born, providing the community with a path toward genuine engagement.

In times of division, listening is not just a strategy; it’s a statement. It recognizes that the way forward lies in coming together, ready to truly hear those we may not agree with or fully understand. Just as in 2020, this moment offers us a chance to prioritize listening over speaking. By taking a page from Lewisville’s playbook, we can work toward a stronger, more connected community — one that meets challenges with empathy, openness, and a willingness to learn.

Let’s explore how the power of listening can guide us through this moment, as it has before.

Here’s a quick primer on Lewisville: It’s 10 minutes away from Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport, home to Lewisville Lake — the Urban Bass Fishing Capital of Texas! — great schools, a thriving historic downtown, and a lively arts scene. Its population is 137,315. The racial and ethnic makeup is 41% white, 29% Hispanic, 14% Asian, and 12% African American. 

Here’s how the City of Lewisville described its listening initiative.

The brutal and needless death of George Floyd in June 2020 brought a new focus nationwide on the inequality that still exists in our country and on the need for systemic change. Even though this event happened many miles away, Lewisville is not outside this damaged system and Lewisville has to be part of any lasting solution.

Toward that end, Mayor Rudy Durham expressed a desire to hear directly from the African-American community. At his direction, city staff created a community group to listen and learn together and then help build a path forward for Lewisville. This group was called Mayor’s Commission – Listen Learn Lead. The name reflected the need for city officials to listen to under-represented communities and the need for those residents to be heard. It also mirrored the leadership model of George Washington that people should first listen and learn before they try to lead.

The instigator of this listening program was James Kunke, the city’s longtime community relations and tourism director. I’ve known James for more nearly 30 years. He’s as seasoned and successful as any local government communicator I know — and brutally honest as well.

“Let’s start by just acknowledging the fact that listening is not something that cities have done well historically, and as a result, it’s not something that comes naturally for city administrators and even city council members,” James said. “City administrators and city employees have gotten used to the idea of, we are trained, we are professionals, we see the big picture. We know where we’re trying to take this community. And a lot of the voices out there are people that don’t know what they’re talking about, don’t know any better, (and) have personal, you know, selfish interests. So, they can say all they want, but we know what’s best. They may not phrase it that way, but that’s a common attitude.”

The commission was created when James heard rumors of a potential protest brewing in Lewisville. James approached the city manager with the idea of a listening program. She liked it and presented the idea to Mayor Durham. He liked it, too, and immediately directed the staff to make it happen.

A 30-person commission was formed. Some members were already serving on other city boards and commissions, some were business owners, some were with the school district. James said a large Baptist church in town provided several members. All were Black.

The meetings included the mayor, a rotating city council member to avoid a quorum, the city manager, assistant city managers, police chief, fire chief, human resources director, and James.

“The rule was (for city staff and elected officials), you say nothing when the meeting starts,” James said. “You just sit there, you listen, you take notes, you make note of questions, but you don't speak.”

Listen

The first two meetings constituted the “Learn” portion of the commission. At the inaugural meeting, the topic was: “What is your experience as a black man or black woman in the United States? What is your experience as a black man or black woman in Lewisville?”

“Some of the things we heard were shocking,” James said.

Here are a couple of stories James recalled; I went to the video of the meeting to find them. The first story is from Funmi Nwokolo, who grew up in Nigeria and now teaches in the area. Like other speakers, she said she and her Black friends are accustomed to being followed by security personnel in retail stores and treated with suspicion by police officers simply because of the color of their skin. It’s just a regular part of their lives.

Funmi Nwokolo speaks at the first Listen Learn Lead meeting.

“Some people flee this country because of that, because they don’t want to deal with it anymore,” she said. “One of my best friends, her brother … he went to college in, I want to say, Iowa. I might (have the state wrong), but it’s a place that wasn't very diverse. He could have stayed here in the States, but he left and moved back to Nigeria because he said he got tired of people following him, people treating him badly, police mistreating him. He doesn’t know how black men can stay here, so he just moved back to Nigeria.”

Said James: “That was eye opening.”

Here’s another story, from Tamela Bowie, who lives in Lewisville and owns two businesses in the area. She recalled a day when she was out fast-walking in her neighborhood and was called a racial slur.

Tamela Bowie shares at the first meeting.

“I’m minding my own business, trying to stay in shape, and this white truck passed by with this white guy in the truck,” she said. “And I’m just doing fast walking, trying to make sure I’m getting my steps in. ‘Nigger!’ And so, I was like [pause] I turned around because I’m like [pause]. Is he talking to me? And so, I said, you know what? He didn't say that. He said something else. He said something else. So, I kept on walking. But then my spirit was vexed because I wasn’t doing anything but just minding my own business. So, I get home and I go to the kitchen where my husband is cooking, and I said, you know what? I said I was called a nigger when I was outside walking, minding my own business. … I said, that was the first time I was ever called a nigger. And you know what my husband said? ‘No, it wasn’t. That was just the first time it was said to your face.’ And that stung. That really stung.”